Mother’s Day…a special day for your family to show appreciation for all you do. Yet, how well do you show that appreciation to yourself? I encourage my clients to examine their self-care and consider ways to improve their habits. Making self-care a priority in your life has numerous benefits. Cheryl Richardson, author of The Art of Extreme Self-Care, states: “When we care for ourselves deeply and deliberately, we naturally begin to care for others in a healthier and more effective way. We make choices from a place of love and compassion instead of guilt and obligation.” Our emotional, physical and mental health improve when we take the time to recharge our batteries and effectively care for ourselves.
On this Mother’s Day I encourage you to assess your self-care habits. What do you do to recharge your batteries? Can you bring renewed awareness and intention to your self-care? Here are three suggestions help improve your self-care.
Just say no.
Most of us are happy to step up and help out. Yet, saying no to requests is a great step towards self-care. We often take on new commitments, even when our plate is full. Your child’s school needs a treasurer for the annual benefit. Your colleagues would like you to head a new resource group. Your sister-in-law needs help over the weekend. You say yes because you like to help and not disappoint others. I urge you to practice saying no and getting comfortable with disappointing others. Saying no will help free up some time and say yes only to those things that truly matter. And, as you give yourself permission to disappoint others, you will feel less stressed and more authentic.
Let go.
Consider tasks or activities that you can give up in order have greater time and energy for self-care. Let go of trying to do it all. Can you hire cleaning help? Can you bring a store-bought dessert rather than homemade to the neighborhood dinner party? Perhaps most importantly, can you ask for help while letting go of the way others help you? Because let’s be honest, perhaps we feel we have to do it all because we like to control how it all gets done. So, ask your husband to fold the laundry, even if he doesn’t do it the way you do. Enlist your kids to make beds, dust furniture, or prepare a salad. Work on asking for support, receiving help, and letting go of the notion that the tasks are yours to accomplish and control.
Take 10.
One of the easiest ways to create new self-care habits is to start small. What can you do for just 10 minutes a day? One of my clients began the practice of waking before her family to enjoy a cup of coffee by herself in the quiet of her kitchen. She found this helped her start the day with greater calm and focus. Perhaps a 10-minute walk may be the thing to recharge your batteries. Experts tell us that spending time in nature provides a multitude of benefits. Another client incorporated a 10-minute break in her work day. She closed her office door and spent time connecting with loved ones. She reached out by email, text, and began sending more cards and notes to friends. Discover what helps you recharge, whether it’s time spent in quiet solitude or intentional action and add it to your routine for just 10 minutes a day.
Creating intentional self-care habits is a gift to give yourself. Think about what will protect your time or enhance your energy. Consider saying no to others in order to meet your own needs. Examine the many things you juggle and enlist others to help you accomplish them. Reflect on what you need to care for yourself. Would you like to feel more energized? More peaceful? More joyful? Be intentional about pursuits to add more of what you need to your daily life, even if it’s for just 10 minutes a day. You deserve it – on Mother’s Day and every day!